Top 10 Reasons You Should Hire Me

10. I only steal gluten free lunches.

9. Perfect face for phone and email communication.

8. Office party designated driver.

7. Internet IQ tests going around Facebook tell me I’m anywhere between “above average” and “genius.”

6. I taught 4th – 8th grade band for ten years. Could your job possibly throw anything more challenging at me?

5. (Your business name here) is my favorite business.

4. I need a new washing machine.

3. I hate travel, so I’m always around.

2. My faith dictates that I love you even if you’re a horrible boss.

1. I finish projects even if I think they’re stupid.*

 

*I finished this list, didn’t I?

Advertisements

4 Comments

Filed under Uncategorized

4 responses to “Top 10 Reasons You Should Hire Me

  1. Anyone who can handle 4th through 8th grade students deserves a big medal and a job!

  2. Update: I was hired by WSI Smart Marketing as a content writer. Yay! It wasn’t for any of the reasons I listed, though. It wasn’t because of my resume, either. It was because of my consistently awesome Facebook statuses. At least that’s part of the reason.

  3. Pingback: Marie Millard, a writer of wit and wonder | Laura McHale Holland

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s