Tag Archives: relationships

My Friend’s Boobs

My friend has a great pair of boobs. People are always saying to her, “What a great pair!” And they are. They’re not exactly alike, but few pairs are.

Anyway, my friend usually wears a casual everyday bra (“Great pair” everyone says) but she also has a bra for fancy outfits. This bra is cut a little lower so she can wear lower necklines with it. It also does a little more heavy work and smushes her boobs together a little, unlike with the everyday bras.

Recently, my friend put on some weight, so she went to buy two new bras. If the everyday bra worked to her liking, she planned to go back and get more. (Bras are expensive!) Unfortunately, the everyday bra that felt okay in the fitting room felt very much too tight in everyday use, so my friend, loathe to go shopping again, started to wear the fancy-time bra every day.

The great pair was inseparable now. “Great pair!” Even more people said.

But it was August, and things got a little sweaty. One day my friend realized she had a rash between the great smushed pair and had to buy some Lotrimin. She didn’t wear a bra at all for a while. Was the pair even together anymore? No one could tell.

You and I are like my friend’s boobs. We’re a great pair. Everyone thinks so. But too much closeness can be unhealthy. Our relationship needs an everyday bra. Fancy-time bra for fancy weekends once in a while. I hope you can understand. Fancy-time bra relationships seem exciting. Even more people than usual exclaim “What a great pair!” But it doesn’t last. And then things go south.

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